A Kiss in the Dark
by Otakucraziness
Summary: Beyond Birthday is a murderer. Can he ever change?
1. Chapter 1

Sumika

What are the reasons murderers kill?

Don't get me wrong; I don't think it's right to kill anyone no matter what reason it is, but I sometimes ask myself that question.

Why?

Do they want revenge for society treating them badly? Do they think that killing people helps relieve their emotional pain? Are they just clinically insane?

Answers, anybody?

Guess not.

Recently, these questions have been popping up more often because of the BB serial murders that have been going on.

What's his motivation to kill?

I look out through the window of the train I'm riding. I'm returning home to Los Angeles from a business trip in San Francisco. I read the news regarding the murder cases with a startled expression.

There were three Wara Ningyo (straw dolls) left at the crime scene. Last time, there were four.

What I'm most worried about, is how I unfortunately live in the city where BB is killing people.

But I'm not too scared. What are the chances he'll end up trying to murder me anyway?

The train arrives in Los Angeles with a screech of the tires. I exit the doors, rolling my luggage along.

I walk the rest of the way home because I left my car in the garage at home.

My house isn't too far away, so it isn't that big of a deal. While walking, I just had to stop to admire various things around my house that have been there since forever. I notice new details that I did not notice before and smile, satisfied. There is something so indescribably relaxing walking through the summer evening.

"Home at last!"

I walk into my house with a cheerful expression. I've always been more of an indoor person who liked to stay home, so the business trips were often more than slightly stressful for me.

I look at the clock, the hour hand pointed at the eight, glad I ate dinner on the train. Bed time!

Before going to my room, feeling parched, I drank a cup of water refreshing me immediately. I instantly feel better and prepare to go to bed.

I lay in bed thinking about what I need to remember tomorrow.

And slowly, I fall asleep while thinking.

_Squeak squeak!_ I hear the floorboards creaking.

I can't open my eyes.

Why can't I open my eyes?

I toss and turn to wake myself up, until finally, I'm able to force my eyes open.

I sit up, blinking and adjusting to the dark, and there I see a man with a knife. A very sharp knife.

He was tall and had disheveled black hair. His eyes were...unstable.

"Impossible." He says in disbelief. His eyes widen in temporary shock.

"What?"

Who is he and how did he get in? In my room with a KNIFE?

"I was sure I drugged the water she drank..." He mumbles, "No worries though," brandishing his knife, "I can still kill you like this."

Then he lunges at me.

"Shit." I rolled away from his assault and leap out of my bed. I need to think of something, quick.

"Why are you murdering people?"

He looks surprised for a second before reverting back to a glare.

"They've always treated me like a back up, like I was never a individual person. I was always second, always the back up. The back up. The back up." His crazed expression smiles insanely, and he lunges again.

This time, I'm not as lucky. He manages to pin me against the wall, one hand holding my own above my head and the other with the knife at my throat.

Just a flick away before taking my life.

"Why me?" I stall, trying not to sound desperate.

"Because, you were meant to die today anyways." He says this while looking above my head.

"How do you know?" I ask and look him into the eye. He seems slightly startled. He probably never had a victim who he had to kill while looking into their eyes.

"Well, you're about to die, might as well tell you." He smirks, and bright red eyes glint deviously, "I have shinigami eyes. I can see your real name and your lifespan."

My heart pounds in my chest, and I desperately try to get it under control, simultaneously wondering; What is his deal? If he's angry, he shouldn't take it out on me.

"No one is going to treat you like a real person if you don't treat them like real people." I know it probably isn't the smartest idea to provoke him, but it wasn't fair to the rest of the victims.

"I know, which is why my last victim will be myself."

Dang, this guy's insistent on killing me. He's sure not getting the meaning in my words.

But I am not letting him defeat me.

"But I know that you can change." I continue trying to persuade him, "Everyone can change. As long as they put in the effort to change."

He looks down at his feet as if in thought.

"I can help you, suicide and murdering is never the answer." I offer. Might as well put in all my effort, I was going to die anyway.

His arms fall slack to his sides and he lets go of me. He sinks to his knees, and guess what I see? There are tears falling from his eyes and trailing down his cheeks.

Real, honest, genuine tears.

"Are you okay?" I ask softly, looking at him in concern. This is a big change in character from his crazy insaneness just a bit before.

He nods and clenches his fists.

Did I unintentionally insult him or something?

"Look, I'm sorry if I unintentionally insー"

Next thing I knew, I was in his arms. What?

He was hugging me?


	2. Chapter 2

**Beyond Birthday**

I don't have the ability to trust people.

I've never been treated normally.

Ever since being brought into the Wammy house, I've been treated as L's backup. Everything I am was for him.

I tried to get used to it, but eventually...

I broke.

I broke and shattered. I escaped from the Wammy house and went insane. It was too much pressure, being a backup. No one seemed to love me for who I was, but more as "L's successor."

Each and everyday, I seemed to lose one more piece of myself. Then finally, I flipped.

That's when the idea came.

In order to get revenge, I decided to become the world's greatest criminal.

Yes, I was going to create a series of crimes even L himself will not be able to solve. I was going to surpass him as a rival.

That's when the murdering began.

I needed a symbol to represent me, something to leave at a crime scene. That way, they would know who committed the crime.

I thought of the Wara Ningyo.

They were perfect they had just the right amount of mystery. They looked quite horrifying, it would give the police quite a scare.

I drugged all my victims. I felt it would be easier to experiment with them when they were drugged.

But it was also a because I didn't want to see their eyes.

Their eyes when they were about to die. I didn't want to imagine or see it.

I'd didn't want to know, I don't want to know, don't think, don't think.

I turned cold and lost my emotions. To kill, you must not have heart, only mind.

So you would understand my shock when I saw her eyes.

I had prepared to get this over with quickly. She looked like a nice person, but nice people are always clouded with evil thoughts. Nice people knew how to manipulate you, they knew what would make you like them. They knew.

That's why I wanted to get rid of them.

Then she opened her eyes.

Her eyes were terrified, but they were calm. I knew that she was running out of ideas to stop me, because in the calmness of her eyes, I saw panic.

I never thought I would speak to a victim. I didn't think I would ever understand them. Their thoughts, ideas, I always thought they were too far away to understand me, to care about me.

I was wrong.

I think she understood me more than anyone has ever understood me. And all she did was look into my eyes and ask a few questions.

But she was going to die.

Her lifespan.

It was going to end today.

And there was nothing I could do about that.

All I could do was cry like a baby, and before I knew what I was doing, she was in my arms.

She was warm. And it was the most comforting feeling I've ever felt.

It was like I was just reborn and given a heart again.

That's when I knew she was going to be able to help me.

But how?

She was about to die, and how could I, someone who has murdered people, be expected to change?

My whole life has caused me to become who I am.

Can I change?

Or am I doomed to become the world's greatest criminal...the worst anyone has ever seen?


	3. Chapter 3

**Sumika**

I open my eyes to see sunshine seeping through the gaps of my blinds. I groan and try to get up, but something was restricting my movements.

Through my half open eyes, I see a face. I realize that arms were restricting my movement.

Whose arms?

I force my eyes open and look, realizing that I was being hugged.

By the guy who tried to murder me.

"Huh? Wait...AAAAAHHHHH!" I remind myself that yesterday he had tried to _murder_ me and I start to freak out.

Wait, keep calm. I have to think about what happened last night.

Ok, so he hugged me last night and we both must have fallen asleep...I think that's it.

I sigh in relief. And then I hear the rustling noises of clothing.

"Good morning." He says it as if he didn't try to kill me yesterday.

I keep calm, afraid that he was going freak out if I didn't.

"Good morning, I'll go make breakfast!" I flee to the kitchen..

I start to flip pancakes and fry eggs. Anxiety runs through my body. I'm not sure what to do wit him. Should I report him to the police? Should I listen to his story? Should I run?

I hear footsteps coming out of my room. They, of course, come directly to the kitchen.

"...Breakfast is ready." I try to say this in a cheerful voice, but it doesn't come out the way I wanted it to.

We plate the breakfast and we eat. The room is filled with an awkward silence that I do not want to disturb.

"So...yesterday you said you would change me." He starts the conversation, "How do you plan on doing that?"

"I don't know, but as I said, anyone can change as long as they out their heart into it." I reply. Was he testing me?

"I want you to change me, I don't want to be like this."

I flinch. That look, he looks so vulnerable, like a kicked puppy.

"Yeah, but didn't you say something about my life ending soon?"

Silence once again fills the room. He looks above my head with a pained expression. Then, he stops and stares.

"Your life span," He gapes, "your life span has extended."

My eyes grow wide. Is that possible?

"...Maybe, when I decided not to kill you, I changed your fate." He whispers in a guilty voice.

"Maybe."

"So, how do you want me to change you?" I question.

"Isn't that your job?"

"No, I'm here to change you, you're here to decide how you want to change."

He thinks for a moment. Then he smiles.

"...Do you really want to know?"

"Yes I do."

He smirks, "I want you to be my girlfriend."

"...Huh?"

"Well, I've never liked a girl or felt like I wanted to protect someone, so I thought you could teach me that."

I think about it. If I were able to help him understand this stuff, then he'll be able to work with own devices sooner, right?

It's not a bad idea, but I don't quite like dating, it's too complicated.

I think a little more and reply, "Fine, but once you understand how to love, we're breaking up."

"That's fine, I just want to change."

I nod and pace to my room.

"Where are you going?"

"Get ready, we're going on our first date."


	4. Chapter 4

Sumika

Silence.

There's not much else happening.

We're walking down the sidewalk looking away from each other with a two feet distance in between us. We look like two strangers who just happened to be walking near each other.

Some date this is.

I sigh, I don't know what I should do. Should I talk to him?

Guess I'll start the conversation.

"So... Where do you want to go?"

"There."

I look to where he is pointing and see a Ferris wheel.

"The amusement park?" I ask.

He nods quietly and silence overtakes us again.

We walk slowly towards our destination. No words are spoken between us.

"What ride do you want to ride?"

He finally spoke.

"The rollercoaster."

He stiffens, but nods.

Once we board the ride, he grabs onto the bar that acts as a seat belt. He looks down at his hands while shuffling his feet.

"You scared?"

He shakes his head furiously, but he's obviously scared.

I reach out and grab his hand.

He lifts his head and looks at me with a surprised look.

I don't want to embarrass him, so I say, "I'm scared."

He seems relieved for a moment before returning to his usual expressionless face and nodding.

Then, the cart starts moving.

We just got off the ride and now he's running towards the trash can. Maybe it wasn't such a great idea to ride the roller coaster...

"Hey, are you okay?"

"Yea, absolutely fine."

Then, he throws up again.

I'll let him choose the next ride.

By the time he's done being sick, it's already 6:00 pm. The sky was a a light dusk color and the sun was just beginning its descent towards the horizon.

"Which ride do you want to ride?"

"...The Ferris wheel."

He points toward the tall wheel that move gracefully towards the sky and back down.

"Okay."

There aren't many people, so we get on the ride without having to wait very long. The glass door closes behind us and we are left alone in the little room.

I sit down on the bench opposite of him. There are no words being said between us, so I decide to start a conversation, again.

"I didn't realize it until now, but what should I call you?"

"Just call me BB."

I want to argue that by calling him BB, people would know who he is. But maybe he doesn't have another name, so I keep quiet and look outside.

"Why'd you choose the Ferris wheel?"

"What?"

"Why did you want to ride the Ferris wheel? Usually girls like the Ferris wheel."

"You feel like you're flying."

"You want to fly?"

"Flying means freedom to go where you want to. People are unfortunate and are bound to earth, but birds are allowed freedom to go where they please." He takes a breath in and lets it out slowly, "That's all I've ever wanted, freedom."

"Freedom," I mutter, "I've never thought of it that way."

"Well, after you go crazy and decide to murder people, your thoughts are pretty different from normal people."

"Do you think you're not normal?"

"Yes, but you're also quite weird."

"Oh?"

"A normal person wouldn't offer to help a murderer. A normal person wouldn't agree to go on a date with a murderer. And a normal person," he looks straight at me, "wouldn't have a murderer falling in love with her."


	5. Chapter 5

**BB**

I sat, silent, awaiting her answer. I haven't felt like this before. It felt like my heart was trying to swallow me up.

Then she laughed.

Why is she laughing? What's that supposed to mean?

I sat there, confused, until she offered me an explanation.

"You're kidding, right?"

I shook my head in denial.

Then it was her turn to look confused. "But it's impossible for someone to fall in love with someone they've known for a day!"

My heart dropped down to my stomach, "Love at first sight is possible!"

"No it's not. If you fall in love with someone like that, you just like them for your looks!"

"No! I like you because...because you give me a warm fuzzy feeling over here." I pointed at my chest.

"But that means you only fell in love with the things I've bothered to show you."

"What?"

"I'm not only made up of what I've shown you, I have dark sides in my mind and heart which take people time to see and understand."

"I can understand that! I can accept it all!"

"And how do you know that?"

I felt my heart shattering into pieces. I didn't know what to say to convince her. I didn't know what I was doing. I didn't know why I was in love with her.

I just was.

For the rest of the ride I was quiet. I didn't know how to start a conversation with her, and she probably didn't want to talk to me right now.

We walked the rest of the way to her house quietly. I walked behind her as she walked swiftly in front of me.

I had just realized how utterly embarrassing that was and I felt my face flush red.

I really wish I didn't have to deal with such human feelings. They're gross.

We entered the house quietly and she finally spoke,

"You can sleep on the sofa."

Then she went into the restroom to get ready for bed.

I threw myself onto the sofa and dug my face into a throw pillow. Gah! I hate this!

I lay on my back with my arm slung across my forehead. I felt so confused. I began tumbling on the sofa rolling back and forth. Go away, go away!

"GO AWAY!"

"What the heck are you doing?"

I sat up straight. Shit. She just had to come into the living room when I was in the middle of dealing with my feelings.

"Nothing!"

"Okay?" She obviously wasn't convinced, but she left me alone.

Once she left the room, I gave an internal scream. Not only was I making a fool of myself, she had to see me make a fool of myself.

I went to the wall and repeatedly banged my head against it. Get out, get out already!

"Dude! Don't break my wall!"

I was pulled away from the wall. It was her again.

She yelped, "YOUR FOREHEAD'S ALL RED!"

"Huh?"

"The heck were you doing? Ice!"

She ran into the kitchen and came back with a pack of ice.

"Don't move." She instructed and put the ice cold pack against my forehead.

I could feel my heart pound against my chest. My face was only getting more red in color.

"Haha! I'll do it myself!" I said a little louder than I wanted to.

"Are you sure? You're okay right?"

"Yep! Now give it to me!" I snatched the ice pack from her and held it against my forehead.

"Okay then, good night."

"Yea! Good night!"

She walked toward her room and I heard the door click close.

I don't know how I felt exactly, but I was giggling throughout the whole night.

**Author's Note:**

**Hi guys! Thanks for reading! I really appreciate it. So I was wondering whether you guys like drama in your stories. Or do you guys prefer a more light hearted story? Just wondering and thanks for reading again!**


	6. Chapter 6

**BB**

I awoke the next morning to find Sumika gone. I found a note that read "I'll be back later. -Sumika."

I sighed. Was she still mad at me?

I decided to go out to find her. I haven't had a chance to find new clothing to wear, so I took off my clothes and washed them in the washing machine while I went to take a shower.

I stepped out the door after getting ready. Ugh, I glared at the sun whose bright light shone into my eyes. I really wanted to stay inside, but I dragged my feet out of the house anyways.

Shopping time.

I walked out and searched for a clothing store. I walked into the first one I saw.

I looked around the shop and bought ten pairs of loose jeans, and ten white shirts. I paid for them with the money I had on me and left the store.

Clothes shopping, done.

Now which way was it back to her house?

I looked back and forth hoping to find something I remembered, but all I could do was continue to walk forward.

How long have a walked?

I feel like I'm suffering heat stroke.

That's when I saw her.

I saw Sumika.

And she was hugging a guy.

I felt a pang in my heart. It was then followed by anger.

How dare he get close to her? Anger seethed through me and I watched them while smiling coldly.

Was he the reason why she wouldn't love me?

What happens next? Well, let's just say jealousy is a treacherous emotion...

**Sumika**

"I'm gonna be late again!" I scream as I sprint toward the bus.

I left a note with BB, so he knows that I'm not at home.

I step onto the bus and breathe a sigh of relief. I'm pretty sure I'll get to the client's place on time.

Knock knock.

The door opens.

"Excuse me, I'm Sumika from Infinite, the interior design company. Are you the client who called for our services?"

"Yes, I just moved here, so I need help with setting up the place." The guy who just opened the door smiles and welcomes me into the apartment.

"Sit. I'll get you some tea."

I quietly sit on the sofa and wait.

He comes back into the room with two cups of tea.

"So, do you have any ideas for what kind of design you want for your apartment?"

"Well..."

"Thank you for your cooperation. I'll run this by the design group and we'll see what they come up with. After that, I'll be back to show you the design ideas." I stand up ready to leave.

"Wait! I'll walk you out."

I shake my head, "That really isn't necessary..."

"No, no! I insist."

I walk out the door followed by the guy.

"Thank you for your time, bye!" I turn to cross the street.

Honk honk!

I hear car horns and suddenly everything's a blur as I close my eyes.

"Are you okay?"

I cautiously open my eyes to see the client looking at me.

"Oh! I'm sorry!"

"Hi, Sumika."

I pull back and turn around to see BB.

"Hi! What're you doing here?"

"I got lost and happened to see you." He says with a smile.

There's something wrong, his smile is cold and bitter, unlike the usual.

Regardless, I smile back to smooth things over.

I turn back to my client. "I'll be leaving now, see you again!"

He nods and waves. When he is about to start walking back to the apartment.

"Thank you, Jonathan Smith, for being so courteous to Sumika." BB smiles again.

"How do you-"

"Sumika and I will be leaving now, I'll be seeing you soon."

He grabs my hand a little too tightly, and walks away.

"Are you okay?" I ask.

"Fine, absolutely fine."


	7. Chapter 7

**Sumika**

After work, I arrive home to find BB sitting on the couch seeming...angry?

"Are you okay?"

"Yes, I'm fine."

I step closer to him and crouch down to peer at his face which he turns away.

"Are you sure?"

"I said I was fine!"

He stands up suddenly causing me to fall backwards.

"You should've told me if I had no chance at having your heart! You should've told me!" His hands are clenched into fists and I could see the tears trail down his face. They fall softly down and hit my hands.

"Why are you crying? And what are you talking about?"

He laughs. "Are you doing this on purpose? Or do you like multiple guys surrounding you?" He closes in on me.

"You still haven't told me what we're talking about..."

"You're driving me crazy!" His eyes meet mine, "When I'm with you, my heart pounds, my chest hurts and I go a little crazy. But you've never given me an answer and go to hang out with other guys." He smiles, "so what will it be?"

"Whoa, who and what you talking about?"

"Jonathan Smith."

Oh man, he isn't getting angry with me over my job, is he?

"You know he's just..."

"Is this going to be an excuse? Or is it going to be a confession?" He clenches his fists tighter, "I wish I had killed you that night."

I pull back away from him, feeling a surge of anger flow through me.

"All you've been doing is screaming what you think at me! Your feelings, how they affect you, how I affect you. But you've never let me explain or talk about my feelings!" I scream at him, "Jonathan Smith was just a client and I don't feel like talking to you until I calm down, but right now," I glare at him, "I'm sure I don't love you."

I head towards the front door swiftly.

"That guy! How dare he!" I angrily walk around, "And I even thought he was a nice guy!"

I hit the button at the end of the street and wait for the sign to walk. I begin to walk across the street at the sight of the walking person on the traffic light.

I look at my feet as I walk. I could feel tears about to fall. No matter how angry he was, wishing for me to die made me feel like I didn't mean anything to him.

"I'm not even sure how I feel about him."

At times, I felt my heart clench around him, felt happy around him, felt like he could mean something to me...

But I didn't want to tell him anything before I was sure.

Because I was sure it would hurt him even more if I told him and I was wrong.

"Sumika!"

I hear my name being called and I turn my head to the right.

_Beep! Beep!_

I feel myself being pulled backwards into someone's arms before a large force blows us forward.

Then everything goes black.

**Author's Note**

**I'm sorry about the slow update. School's** **about to start so everything's crazy.**


	8. Chapter 8

**BB**

Nightmares.

I dreamt nightmares.

I relived my killing each one of my victims. The gushing blood, bright pink flesh. Experiences I wanted to forget, they became twice as gruesome in my dreams.

Yet I never dreamt about Sumika.

I was beginning to forget what she looked like.

Were her eyes brown or blue. Did she have black or blonde hair?

But even as I was starting to forget, I remembered the warmth I had felt with her.

I couldn't remember what she looked like, but if could remember her laugh, the way she smiled, how she looked when frightened, the way she looked at me when I had told her I loved her, utter shock...

And how she had last looked at me.

The way she looked at me, it wasn't anger, which I would've much preferred.

It was disappointment.

Every time I thought of it I could feel shame bubble through me.

I didn't want to cause her to look like that.

I wanted her to be smiling, happy around me.

Even as thoughts swam through my head, I couldn't see anything. It was pitch black.

Where was I?

I had to get out of here. I wanted to see her smile again. I wanted to remember what she looked like.

But would it hurt less to forget?

Would she be happier if I was gone?


End file.
